David Cameron's lament

First the TV producers came to Labour and the Liberal Democrats and I refused to speak out (in TV debate) because I was not likely to win;
then the producers came for UKIP and I refused to speak with them
because I was not likely to win;
then they came for the Greens, the SNP and Plaid Cymru and I refused to speak with them
because I was not likely to win;
then, after ruling them out, the producers came for the DUP, the UUP, Sinn Féin, the SDLP and the Monster Raving Looney Party.
And then I was buggered.